People come and go in our lives. Some have seasons others stay for the entire journey. Others pop in, out and seem to follow the change in weather. Some are influenced by others, by life and then slip away. And then one day comes when they move and you know as you watch them drive away it is the very last time you will ever see them. Whether or not they have been a close friend there were shared times, dinners, conversations. It is an unsettling feeling to face the end of anything however to know it is the very last time to see someone prompts a feeling of emptiness.
Today this happen for me. A woman I have known since I moved to this small village, moved away. I actually thought i would probably move before she did. The first years she was quite supportive of me. During the years though she was greatly influenced by my former neighbor so there were testy times. He is one who likes to churn things up. Cause people to be upset with others as he watches the dislike and chaos evolve. What joy it brings to him. So at times she believed the lies he told and particularly the past few months.
She hasn’t spoken to me for months now. I haven’t been invited to the dinner parties as I was in times past. I wasn’t invited to any of the moving away parties given for her, attended by many who have known her for less time then me. It is how it is sometimes in a small town. I know the source of the trouble, the lies about me. The wedge placed to cause the hurt. Even though I know the source, others do not seem to recognize the evil in this one man. That he speaks badly about everyone behind their back even people who supposedly are his close friends. People who now look out for his care.
When I heard this lady was moving I left a note along with a small gift on her door. I don’t like hard feelings and I don’t like for things to end on a bad note. I have lived with deception my entire life. That manipulation for one to be the certain of attention by telling lies about the other. That meanness. And so I understood why this woman acted toward me these past few months with such distaste and such dislike even though I think she knew better of me. It would be going against the others if she showed anything differently to me. It was that understanding that prompted me to write the note thanking her for her support, for the books and such she left at my door. For the delightful lunches she held in her ever so charming apartment. Lunches I wrote a blog about because they were such a departure in atmosphere from this little village. I was always grateful for the invitation, for the support and the books she left for me. It seemed only appropriate as she moved away to let her know one more time that I sincerely appreciated the support and such. So I left the note not knowing for sure when she was scheduled to move.
A few days later I returned home to two jigsaw puzzles and a nice note at my door. I felt I had done the right thing to attempt to offer a positive closure to both of us. The photos on Facebook of a party given told me the time was nearing and reminded me that I was still the outcast the silly man set in place. Today on the way to the post office I noticed the moving truck and thought I would stop on my way back home. As I rounded the corner by her apartment, the moving truck was gone however she was there, engine running in her little white truck loaded down with the odds and ends that moving day brings.
I hesitated for a brief moment then pulled into the drive to say a brief good bye and wave her on her way. I walked up to her truck, she did not lower the window maybe because it is a manual one or perhaps it was blocked by stuff. We tried to chat through the window however I felt she really did not care to talk. So I waved good bye and wished her all the best. As she sped past me in the drive way, I thought well I will never see her again. I quietly said to the vision of her truck growing smaller as it progressed on the street toward the highway…all the best to you for the rest of your years. All the best to you. And sometimes that is all there is yet that last sighting is what will remain for the years to come. I do wish her well and that the remaining years for her are full of joy and laughter. It is a sense of freedom to move away. To have a new beginning and so it is I had my last sighting of her….as that little truck sped through the neighborhood one last time.
And in my heart I wished her safe and happy times for her years ahead knowing that I would never have the opportunity to try to set things straight that the man set so wrong. So acceptance must come with the last sighting and the best wishes for the future.